Since this blog is targeted to adoptive parents I decided to share something I wrote about our adoption. Our soon is now 19 and in the process of finding himself (prayers needed and appreciated).
Where do babies come from?
That is a wonderful question!
To me the answer is from Heaven, from God -Jeremiah 1:5
Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart-.
I am going this way because of a question we have been asked several times:-“Knowing what you know now would you have adopted Alex?” I have ponder about it myself and the answer has always been another question: -Was it really our decision or our prerogative?
Other friends, great people, have said –“I don’t know if I could adopt a child, if I could love him the same. And we say: Sure you would!
I have learned kids are not a request of parents to God but a request from God to us. He comes down (I don’t know why, certainly not because we are worthy) and says “Hey I got this creature made at my own image, and here is the deal: I want you to take care of him or her and bring him back to me. Oh, and by the way it won’t be easy” So here you are and you will hopefully say: YES!!!
Now, how this comes to terms there are million of stories: maybe a beautiful couple year or two in their marriage all excited planning every detail, or perhaps an older couple that thought they were done with having kids and all of a sudden a baby is on the way, or a couple of reckless teenagers, what about a one night stand deal, or even a woman who got paid to have sex. But also what about a couple or a single person that somehow got a call in their heart to adopt. Is any of them more natural than the other? Was any of them really a human decision or was it really a Divine petition for love?
I do not believe we chose to adopt Alex the same way we didn’t really decide to have Nicole and Megan, if it were that simple there wouldn’t be couples that couldn’t conceive.
We know that Alex was our son since he was born, but God asked us to be his parents not in 1989 when he was conceived but in 1997 when we were in line to go into the Lion King Theater in the Magic Kingdom at DisneyWorld; and guess what? We said yes. The same way any of our friends, who have asked, said yes when that pregnancy test arrived positive. In reality, there is nothing different and “special” about us. Our first son just happened to be born through and adoption instead of a c-section.
But what about this “on hindsight” deal (not minding the fact that you would hardly ever get that question asked in the case of children not born from adoption), this is what we think:
Knowing what we know now, of course we would. We would also know how much we love him, how much we need him, how much he needs us and how our lives wouldn’t be complete without him.
Sure we sometimes say “We wish we could fast forward life to just take a peek and make sure everything is going to be ok.”, but we go back to Mother Theresa’s words: “The success of love is in the loving - it is not in the result of loving. Of course it is natural in love to want the best for the other person, but whether it turns out that way or not does not determine the value of what we have done.”
Isn’t this what “real” parents do everyday? And we know for a fact that there is only one type of parents and one type of children: The ones that come from God.